Pheras Ceremony - Wedding vows day 2

2nd event of Tuesday January 16, 2024.

After the many events, it is so sweet that Sarral looks this nervous waiting for Emily to come join him for the Pheras ceremony.

Sarral was in the “gazebo” first and what I assume was a Hindu priest and eventually his father and some other older male relatives joined him and performed a ceremony. I assumed it was considered a holy ceremony since everyone on the platform respectfully had their shoes off, there was incense or a sacred fire, and I believe ceremonial water.

Birds Eye view of the lawn setup before everyone headed out.

The gathering of people started gradually as Sarral and the men were participating in the ceremony.

The Pheras ceremony was the first event that didn’t start with drums and dancing. It was a more solemn event, that was most like a wedding ceremony that we would think of. It lasted well over an hour.

Emily joined Sarral and one of his family members performed a ritual with her.

This ceremony is also where the exchange of vows took place.

To the surprise of Kathy and Chris, they participated for quite awhile in the ceremony. I assume that this is showing the approval of the marriage and the acceptance of Sarral into the family. I hope I get this right from what I looked up, the flower garlands that were given to them to wear is a form of welcoming into the family.

Thank you to Shantanu Sharma for the following explanation of the Pheras ceremony.

These Saat Phere or seven vows are not just 'rounds around a holy fire'. Each Phera signifies a vow that the bride and groom make to each other. Their significance is deeply rooted in our rich Indian culture and the meanings are beautiful.

Phera No.1: Nourishment

The groom leads the bride in front of the sacred fire around which they both bow. As he does this, he prays that their married life together will be just as nourishing for each other.

Phera No.2: Strength

The groom and the bride now bow and pray for the strength to take care of each other, to be strong for one another. The second phera deals not just with praying to the gods for blessing the health of the family and happiness but also with the couple’s vow to remain together even in the face of danger.

Phera No.3: Prosperity

The third phera is that of prosperity. The groom asks the gods to bless their happiness and for this marriage to remain blessed with physical, emotional, and spiritual prosperity. In making these vows, the spouse reaffirms the vows of fidelity to her husband and herself by accepting the responsibility of her new role.

Phera No.4: Family

The fourth phera is when the husband asks to bless the family unit and acknowledges his new wife. In her turn, she vows to ensure that her husband is as happy the best she possibly can. This vow of reciprocal affection is intended to strengthen the bond of the family and strengthen the couple’s commitment to one another.

Phera No.5: Togetherness

This means staying together as a family through thick and thin. In this phera, the bride and the groom are focused on their obligations to their children to come, and make vows to be excellent and loving parents, all the while as they seek the blessings of God for the future children. In the Hindu religion, the importance of these blessings is to ensure the wellbeing and happiness of children they will have.

Phera No.6: Health

The husband asks the Gods to protect them from evil and misfortune for their entire lives, right up until her last breath. In wishing his wife’s life is full of happiness and tranquillity, the bridegroom will also reaffirm his vow to ensure his wife’s happiness. As a response, the bride affirms her unwavering loyalty to her husband.

Phera No.7: Wisdom

At the seventh and final phera, vows are made to remain forever together. There is a more profound significance to this final phera. It not only declares the love and devotion of the couple to one another in their marriage, but it also represents the final step in the binding of the couple together. They promise each other with these vows that they will remain together with wisdom, which is an absolute and explicit promise of love and devotion.

Wisdom isn’t just gained over a lifetime; it is gained over a long period of reincarnation as part of the Hindu religion. In the same way, the friendship and love that are created during the context of a Hindu marriage are intended to be passed on to their next lives as well.

In these pictures the couple is walking around the sacred fire with each of the 7 blessings. They have their shawls tied together and as they throw something into the fire, their hands stay together and they do it together.

All the while the ceremony is going on, there is laughter and talking all around us. Here Emily’s advisor is explaining to us that it is common in many religions including Hindu and Jewish ( his wife is Jewish) to have people talking and conversing during the ceremony. Like us, he grew up Catholic and didn’t understand why there wasn’t complete silence.

In fact in the middle of the ceremony, Sarral’s shoes were stolen by Emily’s friends and a chase ensued. It was hours later and after a ransom that he got them back. More about that later!

The circles under the tree are flower petals.

And of course, at the end of each event, formal pictures were taken.

Phil and Kailey coordinated.

Kathy and Chris are the happy parents of the bride.

Beautiful sisters. Sarah and Emily.

To finish up the shoe stealing story! I am not sure of the timeline since it was the younger generation on both sides doing this. After the Pheras ceremony, a challenge was issued!